Wall Post: Well im single, im really sad today, I feel like Ive trried for months to get the love I need from him, n I realizat my lowest, that he's still not bringing me up, I love him, but I'm not happy and it hurts. I really need to get shitfaced tonight, not to solve my problems, but to laugh, my phones not working so can u or Josh call me n lets party tonight at 12th again, its swoop night, and I need my boys!! It's my turn to get shitty now otay!! :) XO

Remember when someone said something bitchy in middle school and someone would make that cat-growling noise, which I spell as "reer"? Well, I reered out loud today at this:

Status Update: Why do people from the past request friendship on these impersonal networking sites - and then ... NOT EVEN NETWORK. To everyone who is thinking of friend requesting me: HAVE A REASON. A good one.

A little too self-important for my taste. This person just joined Facebook and clearly knows nothing about social networking couth and refinement.

Status Update: gonna drink beer do drugs and meet sluts

Status Update: just met someone who's discovered the cure for AIDS.

right.

Status Update: just ended a real fight without throwing a punch. Holy crap that was unexpected. I owe it to TKC for teaching me how to react to and take control of the situation, and especially for the armbar from a lapel grab. No one got hurt thanks to my training! (well, the other guy may have a bruised ego...)

Status Update: so happy my new book deal is thisclose to being signed! It's been months! Oh, and published 2 stories on E! Online this weekend. Writing 24/7 these days!

Way to make me feel like shit, "friend"

Status Update: purchased single ply toilet paper on accident!!!! oh my my!!

Ew.

Dying sucks. Dying/dead family members suck too. But keep 'em off Facebook, maybe? An example:

3/12: I am so sad that my papa died today.

3/13: I am grieving and it hurts, but all of your kind words make me smile and bring sunshine to my day. Thank you all from the depths of my soul.

3/14: Is busily pondering death and dying. This cannot be healthy.

(Oh, and there is also the album dedicated to the deceased, which was created/posted on the day after the death: "In honor of one of the kindest men I have ever had the privilege of knowing. I love you!" Album title: Samuel Samson Samshire, January 12, 1925- March 12, 2009)

I think maybe take a day off Facebook when a family member passes away, no? Take the whole week, even. Facebook is for many things, but not this. Plus, there are all the psychological issues involved with posting updates like these. Is this person trying to get attention? Sympathy? Is this a cry for help? What goes through a person's mind when she turns on the laptop, opens the browser to Facebook, ponders the blank space in the status update and writes the aforementioned awkwardness?

Wall Post: Hey Girlie, Well, it has been a little crazy in my life. I don't know if you heard I had to have a tumor and nine inches of my colon removed on Jan. 28th? Any how, I was very lucky, everything was benign and I am on the road to recovery. It is not an easy recovery but, I am getting there. How are you and the boys doing? I miss all of you and can't wait to see you. Love, J

Tee. Em. EYE.